this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
