He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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