He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
