The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
