I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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