I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I am available for nakedness
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
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