the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
