we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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