im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I want to make a zoo with you.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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