..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
