well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
