pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
