I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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