drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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