Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
