they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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