Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
