8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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