Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
