i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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