Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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