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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Not even the dog will look at me anymore.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!

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• (904): View more from Florida

  I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.

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• (914): View more from New York

  So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..

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• (229): View more from Georgia

  If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"

  (1-416): View more from Toronto

  You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well

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• (713): View more from Texas

  The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.

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