Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
