youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize