We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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