Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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