I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
