im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
