just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
