that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
