I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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