And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
