I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
