its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
