what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
