I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
