butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
