There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
