We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
