That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
