we're blogging at a bar
God, you're like boner-b-gone
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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