I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
