So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
