He asked to "fluff my boner.."
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
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