My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
