Me. At least after what I've been through.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i drank out of a bidet.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
