i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize