she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
