And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
