FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
